When we lost our baby we had no insurance. YIKES. I know my mom is going to freak out. It was just a choice we made at that time due to risk ratio and what the insurance would cover with my midwife. I do believe in insurance. I recommend people have it.

But did you know that hospitals, laboratories, and doctors give discounts for immediate payments? That’s right. Because we paid at time of service for our diagnostic testing, doctor’s fees, and hospital visits we saved almost $10,000 compared to what the insurance bill would have been.

If I had insurance to cover the visits and only had to pay the insurance fee, co-pays and deductibles I still would have saved almost $3000 because I could pay immediately.

What’s my point?

We are unique because we had the money to cover our medical expenses. What about you? What would a bill for $7000 do to your family’s household budget, savings, or debt load?

We are unique because we have freedom. We have freedom to grieve, heal and rest more than a month without losing income, using up vacation days, having to cut our lifestyle.

What would happen to your savings, your family’s lifestyle, your vacation days if you had to take 3 weeks of time off? What about 3 months?

Don’t get me wrong. My family still has debt we are working on, we don’t live in a beautiful mansion, and we actually only have one car we lease. I am not at a place I would call perfection but I am at a place I can call PEACEFUL.

A place where my husband could leave a very stressful job that was killing him. A place where we can hire a home helper to assist us with the kids, errands, cleaning, cooking etc. A place where we can pack up and move near our family living where we want to live and not where a job tells us we have to be.

I am here to tell you that you can have that PEACE & FREEDOM too. My heart hurts for the people who don’t have the resources and support and go through what Jay and I have gone through four times losing our babies. Each time it gets worse on our hearts but each time we are at a better and better place to deal with the loss. That is from creating more and more FREEDOM in our lives.

The freedom we have in our life wasn’t FREE. In fact for the first 10 years we learned, grew, failed, and worked to so hard we burned out many times. Then we got smarter utilized what we learned and have worked the past 5 years without so much burn out. We still must work, but we have and continue to learn how to work SMART.

Tell me where do you want to be the next time tragedy hits your family. In a place where you are just getting by or do you want to be FREE…

If your answer is YES and if you are serious about learning more about our journey and if it is the right thing for you, call our office at 1888-351-6850 or email us at info@starrhealth.com.

I don’t know if what our family did to create FREEDOM in our lives is right for you. What I do know is we have helped hundreds of people live a better lives and if we can help you we will.

That is our commitment. Helping Families live Better Lives. God Bless you.

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

I know many of you have been praying for my family and I since I put out the prayer request early last Wednesday morning on Facebook. We are grateful for your prayers. They gave us and continue to give us a huge peace through all this.

For those of you who haven’t heard, we lost our un-born baby Gabrielle Daniel Carter. After a routine ultrasound where we hoped to find out the baby’s sex we were informed that the baby was only 16 1/2 weeks in growth not 20 weeks. Later that day our midwife called to inform us the baby had no heartbeat. After another ultrasound and a consultation with an OB we were admitted to Sacred Heart Hospital on the Emerald Coast.

I was induced on Tuesday December 2nd at 7pm. I peacefully passed the baby a little after 3am by myself, then the doctor came and helped to deliver the placenta. The doctor and nurses were quite surprised that I delivered so quickly and without the use of additional doses of inducement drugs, pain killers, or an epidural. They don’t understand the power of prayers and God’s medicine – essential oils… we do and we used them.

We were able to hold our son. We named him Gabriel Daniel a name that God gave me with several signs in the last couple of weeks. Several weeks ago my mother called and told me she had a dream that her grandmother Mary, (my name sake who passed several weeks before I was born) was holding a baby boy. At the time we thought it was a sign she was holding him until he was born but now looking back we believe it was when he passed. By his size and measurements Gabe had passed several weeks ago. From his appearance Gabe was not developing normally and this was most likely determined at conception. We believe God took Gabe early to spare him and us further pain.

I got to anoint Gabe with Frankincense and speak “heaven talk” over him before we had to leave him. It was the most beautiful and special thing. We know without a doubt where our son is. We know without a doubt that your prayers have and continue to have a wall of protection over us.

They allowed us to leave the hospital Wednesday but I was on bed rest. We choose to stay on the Emerald Coast and got a beautiful room on the ocean. Although I couldn’t put my feet in the sand, it was still beautiful to look outside and see it.

We have lost 3 other babies back to Heaven before they were born. The process is difficult. With Gabe it has been most difficult in many ways. If you have had early miscarriages you know the first Trimester is full of worry. Once you make it past the first 12 weeks you feel lighter, happier, worry less and start making plans for your new loved one.

Each person’s process of loss is different. For me I feel numb for a while, then grief comes later. But I am blessed to have an awareness of why God took our baby. My faith does not waiver because Jesus is my Savior and some day I will be in heaven with all my babies.

A week after our loss, my heart and body started to grieve. And then my Immune System started to shut down. I came to a realization that I can not just go back to my regular life with just a little bit of rest everyday. I need time to heal. My husband is a strong man and grieves differently from me as well. Unfortunately he had been sick for almost 3 weeks with a cold that turned into pneumonia before we got our bad news. Afterwards his coughing caused his back to go out which left him in terrible physical pain too. I realized I needed to call in Reinforcements Spiritually and Physically. I am blessed to have a network of support around me who I can ask for help.

I ask for your continued support and prayers as our family heals. During the rest of the month of December and maybe into January we will be taking time off for healing physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Our assistant will be putting up some posts as me in groups and on my page. Please note she will read any message you send in chat, email or direct message, answer those she can and share with me what is necessary. Her direct email is lori@starrhealth.com if you have anything that needs attention.

Thank you again for your support, understanding and prayers,

Dr. Mary Starr Carter and Jay Carter

Some days are just harder than others.  We all have had those difficult days, weeks, months or even years. But many of us have a spouse or loved one who helps carry us through those tough times. Recently I had a tough day and my husband was sick so he couldn’t give me moral support or help. That night as I was struggling to get my kids ready for bed I thought how hard it must be to parent alone.

According to the US Census Bureau in 2013 of 17 million single parent families, 80% are single moms. 1 and 4 kids under 18 won’t grow up with their biological dad.  Single moms struggle financially with more than 50% living in poverty and many close to it. Not only are there financial burdens of raising kids, but I don’t think we can even imagine the stress of a raising kids on our own. Every diaper is yours, every bath time, teeth brushing, laundry doing, grocery shopping, homework checking, and so on. And not to mention cooking and cleaning.

Where I live there are many moms who aren’t single but have husbands that are deployed out of the country. They become single moms again. And then there are moms whose husbands work out of town for most of the week, or do contract work out of state.

Why do I bring all of this up? Before the holidays hit I just want us to think about someone we know or know of that does parenting mostly by themselves. Could they use some help? You may not have the financial means to help them, but could you help in other ways? If they are self employed could you refer some business to them, could you offer to clean their house, do they need someone to do some shopping for them?

This time of year also comes with a lot of charitable donations. It can be sometimes annoying with the constant clanging bells, but remember Christmas is just the beginning of a season that can be very dark and difficult for single parents. Higher utility bills, cost of holidays, babysitters etc. can really overwhelm a single parent.  Giving to a charity that helps the poor will probably help a single parent too.  Taking $25 out of your Christmas budget or maybe even $250 to let someone else enjoy the holiday may be the true sense of Christmas.

In the Bible, God commands us to take care of the orphans and widows, in today’s day and age I believe the same command can go for single parents.  Reach out and give a single parent a hand.

God will give you a thumbs up for it and you may never know how much that parent may need your help.

God Bless,

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

November 15, 2014 marks one year since we said goodbye to our Central NY home and moved ourselves down to the Panhandle of Florida. I remember that day so vividly. I woke up before anyone else and was downstairs feeding Sarah when a small knock came at the door. It was my neighbor Kip who wanted to say goodbye just one more time before she left for work. She had me in tears before she left with the realization this was it… we were really leaving my hometown of 39 years.

I cooked oatmeal for breakfast and we rushed to pack what was left of our house in our Sienna Toyota van. We had already packed up a moving pod, which had left 5 days earlier. Our whole life downsized to a little POD and our van. It was a good thing we had negotiated with the new owners and they kept all our big stuff, which meant less moving expenses and a fresh new start.

We finally packed up the van with minutes until the new owners would arrive. I left my favorite stainless steel pot behind with oatmeal still in it. Bummer. Next we would say goodbye to Joshie’s best buddy and his dearest sitter since birth Miss Debbie and her granddaughter McKenna. That was really hard. Ironically it had been just 11 months prior that we told Miss Debbie that we would most likely be moving out of NY in a couple of years but never thought it would be this soon.

This was a difficult parting as in just 3 ½ years we had changed each other’s lives forever. We introduced her to a new career at 55 and she with more than 40 years experience in childcare taught us about loving and caring for our newborn, infants, and then toddler.

Right around September 13th 2013, my husband got a strong call from God about selling our home to our friends and us moving down with his mom. Ironically again his mom and stepdad had purchased a neighboring house and cottage that they had been fixing up for family like us to come visit in the winter. Everything was lining up.

On October 24th, my baby and I made a trip down to assess our new living arrangements, do some interviews, and try to get a grasp on what our new life would be like. Baby Sarah and I had a good time.

So on November 15th we started down the east coast to our new home. Stopping along the way to see my sister in Virginia, my chiropractic buddy in South Carolina, and my God child and BFF in Atlanta.

Finally we made it to Florida. Initially we stayed with my in laws for about 5 days until the house was ready. That first night I was scared, the second night I was scared, and that continued for about 6 weeks. See, I went from mostly citified to now living in a house in the woods. I couldn’t walk outdoors at night by myself. IT WAS DARK and frogs and creatures were on the ground. But eventually I grew less fearful.

Don’t get me wrong. I am still not comfortable being outdoors, but it may have something to do with all the WARNINGS I was given about the outdoors in Florida.

I know one of the reasons God brought us back to Florida was to bless us and maybe we would be of service to others here. But mostly He brought Blessings in the form of our in laws. Two amazing individuals who do so much for us. Hard working, God loving, doers and givers and we have been so blessed by them.

Christmas came and it was an awesome holiday spent with my husband’s brothers and sisters. The first of the year brought some challenges as we lost a baby to miscarriage but I got away for my first mommy retreat in March- just God and I and it was the most healing time.

In March my marvelous Mommy Helper, Christie moved to Florida too as God also called her to make a change. She has been the best thing for our family and I think this move has been a blessing on her life too.

In April my kids turned 1 and 4 and we got to travel to visit my snowbird parents and grandparents in their Florida winter homes near Sun City. It was great to see them so happy and get to spend time with them. For half the year, my parents are just 6 hours away.

Something happened after my son’s birthday. He changed, matured, and finally got fully POTTY TRAINED…  months of cleaning up the most disgusting messes you can imagine, all changed when he turned 4… along with a promise we would go to see Mickey Mouse when he started “pooping on the potty”. But not only that, it was like a light bulb went off and my mostly non-verbal son just started talking all the time. In fact every few weeks now he grows in leaps and bounds.

In May I started partnering with two local businesses Hello Beautiful and Body B Healthy to help grow a Young Living Essential Oils presence and Trained Raindrop Therapist in our area. It has been a lot of work but I have met some great people and made some new friends.

June was my first trip back to NY unfortunately for my aunt’s funeral. It was a sad time but seeing family and friends was a blessing. The end of June, July, August, and September were pretty intense working months. But a beautiful trip to France revealed a new baby was going to join our family in April. WOW baby #3 was on their way.

September 15th was my husband’s last day working for Corporate America. He made the decision not just based on the growth of our Young Living business but because his job was literally killing him. I am proud of him as he continues to get healthier, happier, and focus on what he wants in life. And I am super happy he will be managing and growing our Young Living business too.

The beginning of October I spent a week working in NY. It was really nice. I feel like when I see my friends again we don’t get a lot of time together but rather it’s quality time.  And in fact several of them have come down to visit us in FL or we see each other at events.

October was our first vacation as a family that we hadn’t felt the stress of my husband’s job. No phone calls in the middle of the night, no interruptions, no working while we were supposed to be relaxing and no end of vacation blues because this is our life now.  This is our LIFE NOW… THIS IS OUR LIFE NOW…  seems weird to say.

As I write this, I can hear training bombs going off at a 60 mile away or so Army or Airforce Training Facility. We live in the midst of a several Armed Service Stations…  there are many military in my town and surrounding towns. I have met many wives and moms whose husbands are deployed for months at a time. I have to wonder if God brought me here to help some of them…  or maybe to train some Young Living Distributors who may help make their lives brighter. I think that may be part of my role here.

The transition to life in Florida hasn’t been easy but I know it’s good. I have become a better parent learning to love and care for my children at an even deeper level. I have learned how to face my fears …  particularly snakes….  (you just scream and run). I have learned to manage a household and a business better, I have learned that wherever you go there are people you can help, serve and love.

I will always love you NY but Florida is now my home. So I guess I need to learn the Florida state’s song LOL!

What does the vacation of your dreams look like?   

Is it a Cross Country Trip with the family in a beautiful giant RV?   

Is it a trip to France seeing everything from the French Riviera to Paris?

Is it a backpacking trip across Europe?  

Is it seeing your grandkids halfway across the continent?

Is it a “girlfriends” all inclusive vacation to Aruba or to your favorite Island?

Is it taking your kids and family members to Disney World for a week?

Is it traveling to a luxurious resort surrounded by beautiful scenery getting massages, saunas, healthy foods and fitness all week?  

Is it a getaway cruise for you and your Sweetie?   

Or maybe it is a just a serene stay at the beach where you can soak up the sun and have some solitude?

Any of these sound awesome to you?

Well I am here to tell you all your dream vacations are possible.

I am about to show you how a dream vacation doesn’t have to take 10 years to save the money and do.

And lastly I am about to show you how taking a dream vacation could even be a tax write off.

Sound crazy? It’s not. In fact I have been traveling and having fun for the past 14 years all because of a home business I started this month 15 years ago.

Let me be clear. I started a Network Marketing Home Business in November 1999.

A Network Marketing Business has a parent company like my company Young Living Essential Oils who researches, sources (or grows in our case), produces or manufactures the product, and distributes the product to the customers or distributors. In addition, the parent company pays its distributors commission on their sales volumes and the sales volume of the team of distributors they personally have enrolled and worked with.  

Does that sound complicated? It’s not really. You fall in love with a product made by a reputable company. You start sharing this product with people you love. You make the decision to do it as a business. You get training to learn how to do it as a business and over time of consistently working, you get results.

Results equate to a residual income. A residual income means getting paid month after month from your consistent part time efforts. And for the majority of us who continue to learn and grow personally and professionally, that income goes up and up.

So how does your dream vacation come in to this picture? When you have a home business, you have the ability to travel and teach others. This at first may be just locally, but even in my early stages of business I made sure that I shared with friends and family. This allowed me to set up meetings and short vacations when visiting them. My sister lived 7 hours away. My home business gave me the opportunity to see her several times a year. She loved the product too, became a customer and we would do meetings in her house.

My mother in law fell in love with the products and started sharing too. We were able to visit a couple times a year. Over time as our business grew, we were able to take trips all over the world on cruises, spa trips, vacations to Disney, Sea World, time at the beach, and most recently France. We coupled these trips with meetings we planned ahead of time so we were able to write the majority of these vacations off. (Of course it’s important to consult a tax accountant and the IRS laws to understand how to best organize your trips).

So what is my point to all this? If you are serious about your dreams and dream vacations, you can use a home business to help you achieve those dreams. It will still involve work, time and money but what you will be creating is a residual income and the ability of creating many beautiful memories.

Let me know what your dream vacations look like. Come over to my Facebook page and share.

Here are a few pictures of some fun we recently had on our “Work Vacation”.

These past weeks have been full of some serious and sad news for my family and friends. As one ages, we become more and more aware of how precious life is. There are no guarantees how much time we have with loved ones.

But in the reality of aging we must be aware of another important topic that effects couples, children, and loved ones. It is the topic of CARE for the CAREGIVER.

Love is an amazing and wonderful thing but sometimes it can blind us. What do I mean?

Have you ever had a friend who is a born caretaker? Meaning they get “great job” from helping others. They thrive on it and will go ABOVE and BEYOND to help their family, friends and almost anyone. The problem is in doing so sometimes they become off balance and GIVE and GIVE and GIVE all that they have emotionally, physically, and even sometimes financially. After years of this process they start to realize that they have hurt their own health and happiness.

When we are a Caregiver of a loved one and when they are dealing with a significant health crisis the same can happen. We do and do and do and forget to take care of ourselves.

I once had a patient who had Type II Diabetes. Although she was a good eater and mostly healthy, I dug deeper into her story. For more than 5 years she was the sole caretaker of her elderly parents who were very ill. It was extremely demanding to her emotionally and physically. After they passed she was not only emotionally grieving but she was physically ailing. Shortly after they passed she was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes. Coincidence I think not.

When our loved ones are hurting, we hurt. In our hurt we will turn to things that help dull that pain. We will stuff ourselves with food, have our nightly wine or drinks, smoke marijuana, do retail therapy or other unhealthy choices that help dull our pain and exhaustion. In doing so we deteriorate our health which ends up leaving less of us to help others.

So what is my point in sharing this information? First we must make it a priority to take CARE of ourselves. Whether we are ailing for loved ones or just a parent with kids to care for.

Here are some good places to start:

1. Exercise and Movement:
I would almost guarantee that every person reading this has access to move their bodies for 15 minutes or more a day if they would make time for it. I would also guarantee there are opportunities to get outdoors and walk, get to the gym down the street, meet a friend for some fitness fun, or simply uncover that treadmill sitting in your bedroom.

If you set yourself a simple goal of 15 minutes a day of continuous movement I bet you could achieve it. Some of my Hurting Harriets friends really need to consider some Aqua Therapy to alleviate pressure off of joints and sitting classes that most YMCA’s offer.

“But I can’t afford the membership fees”. I want to stop hearing that excuse. I guarantee if I looked at your budget I could find monies spent on clothes, gifts, and other non-essentials. If your budget really doesn’t allow for that then look into the YMCA or local gym memberships. And I may need to talk to you about good debt and bad debt. Debt isn’t something I think is good unless it is an investment in something that will cause you to physically or mentally improve so that you can do better and perform better.

2. Planned Healthy Meals and Snacks:
This is a huge topic for most caretakers or those living with just one other person in the family. Many times we rely on frozen meals, eating out, or skipping meals. Not a good plan for the caretaker. Every week, stock up on healthy snacks that will support your energy and focus. Put snacks in the car, your purse, and places where you may need them on the run.  Stay away from a bunch of carb snacks and focus more on protein, veggies, fruits, and maybe a health grain snack.

Ask a favorite great aunt or someone who wants to help the family to make a big healthy dinner with a big salad once or twice a week. This is a trick we have used just in our busy lives and it works awesome.

3. Emotional Support:
We all need support and someone to talk about what we are going through. Sometimes group settings can be a positive thing but sometimes they can really drag us down. Find uplifting and positive groups or friends that you can share an hour or two a week (maybe on a walk) and vent your feelings. Getting help from a counselor is excellent too.

And of course using your Young Living essential oils to help uplift your moods, stay focused, get a great night’s rest and stay calm is always recommended. My favorites are Peace and Calming on my feet before bed. Stress Away as my perfume or cologne throughout the day, and Idaho Balsam Fir or Lavender 10 drops in a 1/4 cup of Epsom salts and 2 tsps. non-aluminum baking soda for a relaxing bath.

So I want you to make me a promise. Promise me you will look at the above list and pick one thing you will work on these upcoming weeks. We need you healthy and happy. No one knows what tomorrow will bring.

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Last week I had the best day I have had in over 12 weeks. I played with my kids part of the day, worked part of the day, I didn’t feel like falling asleep at 2pm, made a great dinner and didn’t pass out at 8:30pm. Why was I feeling so much good energy? Because I am finally through with my first trimester of Pregnancy.
Yes I pregnant. We are 13 weeks and going into our 2nd Trimester.  Although this baby wasn’t planned perfectly he or she is very much wanted. God has shown me a family of 4 children and although I don’t know how that is all going to play out, I accept the joy of being a parent to a small tribe. Being an only child myself with 2 half siblings 11 years apart, I don’t think I or most of my friends and family saw me having more than 1 or 2 children in my lifetime. But this was God’s plan and I accept it.

When you have 3 babies in heaven (through miscarriage) it is very taxing emotionally the first trimester of pregnancy. Every cramp or ache, or slight spotting you think the worst. For me getting pregnant at such a heavy weight I was very discouraged. Not so much about the weight but more that I know it takes a healthy strong body to get through pregnancy. I was really strong when I had Sarah Grace. I don’t feel like that now.

But then God had a talk with me and showed me just because I am pregnant doesn’t mean I can’t continue to grow stronger and healthier. Many women have done it and I can do too.

So my point to you today is no matter what situation you are in, no matter if it isn’t the ideal timing, situation, or even if you feel hopeless. THERE IS HOPE. God has you covered. He has your back, and HE will get you through  no matter what.

God Bless you my friends,

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

I have been humbled by your recent response to my URGENT message telling you that I was taking my articles that talk about Essential Oils and Natural Remedies into a Private Association. You have sent me prayers, warm wishes, encouragement, and comfort. I cannot tell you how much that means to my family and I.

But I want you to know something. I am not going to stop sharing. That’s right. Since July 2011 I have shared my experiences and heart in newsletters and blogs. I have shared many other wonderful stories and introduced you to people whose stories inspire and encourage us.

We will continue to Share. Unfortunately most of our Essential Oil and Health Blogs will be in a Private Association Membership site but many of our personal experiences, Moms of Faith, and just encouraging and motivating posts will stay right here and we will continue to share them.

I am not scared, upset, or angry with this situation. I realize what is important in this world. And although I do feel it is important for all of us to stand up for our rights and work towards stopping this non-sense in our government, media and health care systems I will not be ruled by fear.I know Who my Faith is in and God can do all things with those who Believe.

So in the big picture of things, we still need to be grateful for our blessings. This morning I was reading about the Harnisch Family and their son Gabe. My heart went out to this Christian family who has poured so much into their genius son who suffers from ADHD and OCD and unfortunately has become a threat to the other kids in the house. After years of research they have found a school for boys like him that has helped their son find peace, confidence, a good work ethic, and respect for those in leadership. The school is very costly and they took out a loan for $30,000 already but need to raise another $30,000 for their son to continue at the school. I am asking you to go to this link and see their story. I am asking you to pray for the miracle they need, pray for Gabe their son, and if you feel led please give to this family in need.

We won’t stop sharing. We won’t stop helping and we won’t be silenced because we all are called to do God’s work in whatever form it is.

God Bless you and your family,

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.